Thursday, March 27, 2008

Werx part 2

So FINALLY I put the pen to the paper to map out the adventure of my new little friend, Kuumbo the giraffe. I was sitting at a very unusual clarinet performance last night and felt inspired by the music. I normally wouldn't admit that the sounds the performer was making would be music, it sounded more like he just barely learned to play it that day (I guess that's how it's supposed to sound. Apparently he's been perfecting that technique for the past decade. Go figure!). Anywho, it sounded like the perfect "noise" to accompany the setting that my stories will be taking place in. I'm so excited to get this going! I'm still trying to enlist my sisters help in layering the image I've drawn, but I promise, he's going to be adorable.

In the mean time, I do have something else to offer for your ocular pleasure. Again, it is the product of having to sit through another concert at school. (Just so you know, I don't waste all my time and money going to concerts I don't really pay attention to. It's a requirement for my degree. I have to attend 12 "approved" concerts throughout the semester. Most of them are classical performances by guest artists, but some of them are more "modern" in taste and therefore less easy to fall asleep to.) This concert was part of a Bass festival at ASU and it was "jazz night". I have one observation that I will offer about Jazz Musicians: They have no sense of time. I don't mean that they don't have rhythm (they have that in barrels and heaps). Just that they get so caught up in the music they forget that people, like myself, have short attention spans and that after playing a passage after so many times, if you don't have a great idea next, just end the $%@^ song! Sheesh. These songs only take up 1 page of music but these people drag it out to the equivalent of 47 pages. I'm not against jazz music, don't get me wrong at all. It's just there comes a point in the song when all they're doing is just beating a dead horse.

OK, now I'm really going to get started on the goods for today. While being subjected to this, I realized some things about different genre's of music. I'm going to compare/contrast, classical, jazz, and rock audiences. I got a kick out if it. I hope you do too.

Classical
-Audiences
-Smell good, shower daily

-Do not clap until entire song, including all movements, are finished

- Musicians
- Wear all black

- Best all around tone and intonation

-Both
- Hold completely still during entire show, even while clapping


Jazz
-Audiences
-smell REALLY good, superb taste in cologne

-Clap or yell after every solo and at end of song

-Musicians
- Wear all black

- Best at sight reading and improvisation

-Both
- Bob their heads like they have a twitch, tap their toes


Rock
-Audiences
-Don't remember when they last showered. What's cologne?

- Yell along with singer during entire song

-Musicians
- Wear all black

- Don't care about tone or intonation, just play

-Both
- Look like they're having an epileptic seizure, that's why there's Paramedics at all of the shows


The End
I'm sure there's other observations that I could make based on my concert attendance experiences, but I thought these were pretty funny and almost entirely true too!

6 comments:

Brandon and Camille Smithson said...

LOL. Your comparison between the different music genres is so true! I love it!

Marily said...

Hey Shauna! Fun to happen across your blog--keep writing! LOVE YOU TO PIECES! --Marily

Terry Neff Allen said...

How are you? Love this post on music and agree that Jazz musicians can jam FOREVER!
April and I just got done singing with Rob Gardner in the SLC Tabernacle. It was amazing.
What degree are you working on now?
Keep posting!
Love,
Sister Terry

cheerlubber said...

Lulz, nice observations! Now I just wish that I myself could combine together qualities of jazz and classical musicians: sight reading and intonation/tone. Gugh.

Tiffany said...

Shauna, I think you're one of the funniest people I know :) I love ya!

BiG 10 said...

I need shauna updates!